Here are a few passages and ceremonies I really like.

Love…
The greatest need of the human self is for love.
You can have all the wealth your coffers will hold, all the fame your world can offer, all the education your schools can teach. You can have had your every other wish fulfilled, your every other dream come true, but if love is not among these you will be empty, barren. The need to express love is so vital your physical body is affected if you have no way of giving of your deepest self.

The Prophet - Kahil Gibran
When asked about Marriage he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be for evermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness.
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.

Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.

SAND CEREMONY

_______________ and ______________, today you join your separate lives together. The two separate bottles of sand symbolize your separate lives, separate families and separate sets of friends. They represent all that you are and all that you’ll ever be as an individual. They also represent your lives before today.

As these two containers of sand are poured into the third container, the individual containers of sand will no longer exist, but will be joined together as one. Just as these grains of sand can never be separated and poured again into the individual containers, so will your marriage be.

The couple pour the two containers of sand into the third container simultaneously.

Samaya

There is a Buddhist term, Samaya, which is a sacred bond and translates as “I am with you”. In relationships the “I am with you” can present many obstacles along the way. The challenges for you both will be to give in, to surrender your way of doing things, and not to split when you feel threatened. Basically the challenge is to be genuine – to feel your pounding heart or shaking knees or whatever it is, and stick with it.

Very few of us ever allow ourselves to be in a situation that doesn’t have at least a teensy-weensy little exit, a place where we can get out if we have to. The more you close all the escape hatches and open your eyes and heart to your beloved, the greater the possibility for an enduring, abiding union. As you commit to reality, to staying conscious, you will experience the joy of becoming more alive and present to yourself and your beloved.

The Buddhists teach that nothing happens without a cause. The union of this man and woman has not come about accidentally but is the foreordained result of many past lives. This tie can therefore not be broken or resolved.

In the future, happy occasions will come as surely as the morning. Difficult times will come as surely as night. When things go joyously, meditate according to the Buddhist tradition. When things go badly, meditate. Meditation in the manner of the Compassionate Buddha will guide your life.

To say the words love and compassion is easy. But to accept that love and compassion are built upon patience and perseverance is not easy. Your marriage will be firm and lasting if you remember this.